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SCP-38982

silentsomersaultsilentsomersault Member Posts: 49 ✭✭
edited October 12 in Off Topic
Item #: SCP-38982

Object Class: Euclid

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-38982 is to be regularly kept in a furnished cell with a constant stream of news articles from multiple sources. Anywhere between 6 and 15 English speaking D-Class [1] should be sent to SCP-38982 whenever it begins to initiate a Lambda-Echidna-9 event alongside three armed guards. Said guards must shoot any D-Class who attempt to harm SCP-38982 in any way during the Lambda-Echidna-9 event in order to prevent a containment breach. If killed, SCP-38982 must immediately be recontained.

Description: SCP-38982 is a masculine humanoid. It does not appear to possess any biological needs beyond breathing and occasionally passing waste after recreational consumption of food [2]. Approximately 8 times per day it will initiate a Lambda-Echidna-9 event. During the Lambda-Echidna-9 event it will attempt to ask a question in poorly worded English [3]. The nature of the question seems random but appears to be chosen based on its previous experiences, but is often of an uncomfortable, surreal or pop-cultural basis. If a response considered "inappropriate" by SCP-38982 is given, the responder will fatally [DATA EXPUNGED] [4].

When killed, SCP-38982 will remanifest in a populated area and immediately initiate a Lambda-Echidna-9 event. There is no pattern as to which areas it will appear in beyond being urban or suburban in nature.

<D-5834, D-5209, D-1436, D-4578, D-0217, D-5

[1] This range has produced the most satisfactory results for a Lambda-Echidna-9 event.
[2] SCP-38982's conception of what is "food" appears to be random. It will recognize some forms of food as such and others as not. In addition, it will also treat many inedible objects as food if presented as such in spite of it possessing the same digestive capacity as a non-anomalous human being. SCP-38982 can not be
[3] This appears to be its own invented dialect.
[4] "ye", "nu" and "te" are always considered a valid answer regardless of the question. The current English counterpart of "te" is unknown.

Comments

  • CarmoryCarmory Member, Wiener Posts: 2,954 ✭✭✭✭
    >:]
    lol rir nice flag
  • ¤RunninginReverse¤¤RunninginReverse¤ Member, Friendly Posts: 15,390 ✭✭✭✭✭
    Okay, until I saw "ye," "nu" and "te" I thought this was a serious SCP idea with no references to Carmory at all.

    It still works as a serious SCP, going into it with the right mindset. Obviously, you won't get a 5-digit SCP number(they're still working in the lower half of the four-digit numbers), but you can probably get it submitted with a different number and it'll pretty much work.
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