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Oh shit, That's right, I'm a hat.
"My sexual skill are more than adequate for any witch or wizard" Snape said confidently
And that's not even the worst of it...."Yeah, everyone got shagged but me" Ron said selfishly
Dumbledore looked at Ron considerately "Harry, why don't you leave me and ron alone for a minute?"
Harry, confused, walked out of the office. He stood by the door listening and heard heavy panting.